Freshman Runs Out of Points, But Don’t Worry — He’s Rich

An audible gasp echoed in walls of WeShop today when WestCo freshman, Max McPherson ‘21 was told by a cashier he did not have sufficient points to purchase both a lemon Yerba Mate and organic mango slices. Student cashier, Lisa Baker ‘19, asked if he would like to pay in cash, to which he replied, “Do you accept American Express?” McPherson was then seen running, humiliated, out into Wild Wes and quickly making a phone call.

When The Groundhog reached out for a comment after things calmed down, McPherson welcomed us into his two-room double. He offered our reporter a beverage from his stocked mini-fridge, and sipped on his mint Juul, visibly relaxing with each exhale. “It’s just been a really stressful day,” he rubbed between his brows, “I’ve seen memes about people’s cards getting denied and stuff, but I never imagined it could happen to me.”

After the incident, McPherson called his father, who lives in Los Angeles, sorting out the situation with a simple deposit of $300 worth of points into his Wescard account.

My dad was like, ‘What am I paying for if they don’t even give you enough money for food’, and I was like, I know, Dad, it’s fucked up.”

When The Groundhog asked how he had depleted his points so quickly, McPherson paused for a moment, concluding that he had not been given enough in the first place, and “it’s really unrealistic to expect us to live without, like, unlimited funds.”

Before leaving, McPherson mentioned to our reporters he would be releasing a song about the tragic event called “Perpetual Hunger” on SoundCloud within a few weeks, noting that “It’s hard moments like these that make me a better artist.”

WeShop manager Ken Brown declined to comment because he “has to work for a living.”

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