Resource Center Debuts Confessional Booth for Problematic Students

MIDDLETOWN, CT — Since arriving on campus last year, the Resource Center has been doing its part to make individuals and student groups more aware of their social justice discourses. At times, students have looked to the center for personal advice on how to be more “woke,” performatively lamenting their own transgressions. To keep up with demand for these self-flagellating students, the Resource Center has debuted a confessional booth for anyone wishing to report their problematic behavior.

“I tell everyone I’m bisexual, but I actually reinforce a lot of heteronormative practices in my dating life,” one confessor, Helen Polk ’21 admitted. “I’ll make out with girls at parties but I only end up in long-term situations with dudes.”

Students of all backgrounds, not just Catholics, have been embracing this absolution of guilt.

“I interrupted a girl in my sociology class,” Steven Green ’19 said. “She was making a really good point but I also had a really good point and I just barreled through her. I feel really bad about it.”

After confessing, some students have reported they feel freer to repeat the same offensive behavior, but now with a more black-and-white perception of right and wrong. For others, this confessional marks the first genuine moment of self-reflection they’ve experienced since arriving at Wesleyan.

“I wear thrifted clothes and play up my ambiguous queerness so people forget my class privilege,” a student who wish to remained anonymous confessed. “Everyone is rich at Wesleyan anyway, right?”


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